We are always encouraging friends and family to go to Mexico, even after they’ve told us they have no intention to, and sometimes it works.
You know who you are.
We go at least once a year, and I also spent 18 consecutive years there once (until the Big Friendly Gringo won me over with his hairy charm and imported me into this magical land of almond trees and really big trucks).
Before we take people to Mexico, we sit them down and prepare them for what lies ahead. This year, instead of telling our friends what to expect in Mexico, we figured hey, why not sing it to them instead? The result was a professionally produced song and a hilarious music video we spent 3 weeks filming in Mexico.
There’s some very real, useful information (as well as fuzzy pink handcuffs and some Pepto-Bismol) in this wild video that is not included in the blog post, so definitely check it out if you’re traveling to Mexico.
If someone had shared this information with my white husband, he wouldn’t have had to suffer through the unfortunate toilet scene depicted here:
It’s not as dangerous as your grandma thinks
Still, don’t be a fool. Whenever we go, we keep an eye on the kids in public spaces and any personal belongings. Like I said, we go every year and nothing alarming has ever happened to us, except that one time when Graeme ate at a bad restaurant and then threw up in front of everyone…
Don’t eat at a bad restaurant
His downfall was ordering something obscure from the menu that no one had ordered in the past two years, so when they brought it out…it was two years old. If you’re with friends or family, they’ll take care of you and only take you to safe places. Still, when we eat out, we avoid eating salad and cilantro unless it’s a really nice restaurant.
Berries and greens need to be disinfected
Which is why we don’t eat the cilantro at restaurants. We don’t know if it’s been disinfected. Larger fruits and vegetables can just be washed with a bit of soap and water. Produce disinfectant is sold in grocery stores.
Bottled drinks are fine
Everybody knows, including Mexicans, that you’re not supposed to drink the tap water. But I’ve met a few tourists who think you can’t drink ANY water in Mexico, which is craziness. Anything bottled is fine. We use tap water for brushing teeth and have survived, but if you’re really nasty and like to swallow after gargling, you might want to consider bottled water for this as well…
Driving is madness
I really wish I had learned to drive in Mexico City, because now I would be this fearless, unstoppable fiend. But no…sadly, I learned to drive in California and am very civilized and cautious, which isn’t as fun.
In Mexico, stop signs, traffic lights, and speed limits are all suggestions. Graeme is really brave and turns into a blue-eyed Mexican when we visit, swerving wildly on roads with no lanes, squeezing into impossibly tight spaces with magical magic, and impressively avoiding collisions every five minutes because there are cars EVERYWHERE and they get SO CLOSE. I’m talking three to four inches close. It’s pretty exciting.
UBER and Taxis are a great idea
So you can avoid the adventure I just described. We aren’t brave enough to use public transportation, but have used both Uber and taxis. The only thing is, a taxi driver might charge more if he realizes you’re not a local (he will realize). But then, he might give you a good price. Doesn’t hurt to ask.
If you’re not quite as brave as Graeme, an Uber/Taxi is the way to go and it’s really quite cheap. ALSO, if you are Australian (hi there Heidi), you have spent your entire adult life driving on the wrong side of the road, amongst generally respectful drivers, so…
Maybe don’t attempt driving in Mexico.
But definitely let me know if you do.
Things rarely go according to plan
Which will drive you nuts if you’re not prepared for it. Plans? What plans? And you can definitely forget about regular mealtimes for a while, unless you take matters into your own hands. People eat at hours you might not be used to. All the white tourists will be hangry by 12:30, while the thought of food won’t cross the locals’ minds until around 2 or 3. Possibly. Maybe.
When certain family members who shall remain nameless (and much loved of course) invite us over for “lunch,” it could mean absolutely anything. Will we eat by 2? 6? 10? Nobody knows. And so we eat first, just in case, and then head over and hang out for a long time until “lunch” is ready (by which time we are hungry again) and then we have a nice dinner together.
Punctuality and planning ahead of time isn’t much of a thing in Mexico and you just kind of have to wing it and go with the flow.
To be fair, I do believe my family is notorious for this kind of thing, so you might experience a milder version of this depending on who you stay with.
Again, lovely lovely people…
(Disclaimer in case they read this but they probably won’t because they already know about the berries and stuff)
It’s smelly
In an effort to raise pleasant children and not persnickety, first-world, first-rate nuisances, we never complain about anything while in Mexico, but as soon as we landed in the city, three-year-old Grace and I went into the bathroom at the airport and she immediately wrinkled her nose.
The bathrooms are stinky, what can I say.
Sometimes the water is stinky too. But hey, humanity as a whole pooped in a hole for thousands of years. You’ll be fine. Terrible fumes build character.
What’s that awful smell, Mommy? What smell, Gracie? I hadn’t noticed.
Forest, being older and quite eager to please never complains about this, but a few years ago, we had a bit of an emergency and Graeme had to take Gracie into a bathroom that had a curtain for a door, and I snapped a photo of Forest while he waited his turn. He was covering his nose and mouth with both hands and squatting a little, and then when it was his turn he suddenly realized he really didn’t have to go that bad…
I should print this photo, and when his wife is just amazed at how nice and easygoing he is, I will show her it to her and say, THIS IS WHY.
The smog is formidable
It’s another smelly thing, except this one might also give you a headache. A friend of mine whose parents are missionaries in the city gets a bit of a headache when she first arrives, but then she adjusts. You’ll survive. Bring Ibuprofen.
And Pepto-Bismol, just in case.
And finally…
Don’t overthink it
You’ll be FINE. Going to Mexico is always worth it and such a great experience for the kids. And if it gets a bit rough here and there…it builds character.
Yeah, it can be difficult traveling with kids, but a lot of parents only think about the discomfort and don’t realize it is always, absolutely, 100% worth traveling, even if you miss the flight and the kid throws up at the Dublin airport just for laughs.
STILL WORTH IT.
And if you’re ever not fine (unwashed cilantro), you can always write about it later and in this way turn a moment of unpleasantness into an excellent story to enjoy for years to come!
BUEN VIAJE TO YOU 😎
And in case you missed the video up there, here it is for you so you don’t have to exert yourself. I promise it’s worth watching. Extra points if you can spot my stunt double:
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